Not to Give. I think.
hi again. so the new policy is to be retired, but i'm not sure what policy ought to replace it. after i left here, i walked down toward the botanical gardens and first came upon the church. i went in, had a look around (errata: the sign reads: YES to The Lord is a YES to suffering) and heard the sound of a baby crying around the corner. it sounded so terrible, i went to see what was wrong. on the other side of the gate was a small child, motionless, naked, covered in flies, on a blanket in the street. an old woman was next to him, and another child holding a baby. a very young woman who must have been the mother was there as well. i gave them 80 rupees and turned as a crowd was beginning to gather. they called to my back, "madame, madame!" and i kept walking with my head down and eyes shut. i suppose they figured i would have to exit at some time, and by the time i left the church several minutes later, an even bigger crowd of children, women, and some men as well (this i found a bit offensive -- grown, healthy-looking men reaching over the heads of raggedly dressed children). i gave more, but no one was satisfied. i tried to move forward, they followed, tugging at my clothes, asking for more. i still had to walk away shaking my head and saying "i'm sorry."from there i found my way to the botanical garden's which was a welcome change from the city streets. huge beautiful trees and plants, benches, rocks to sit on. i wandered around a while, people-watching, and then sat and relaxed a bit before heading back toward my room. i walked east to the ocean, and sat along the promenade. several men and boys came up to me and requested that i take their photo. people love to have their picture taken, even though they will not see the result. with digital cameras it is a bit different because they can see a miniature right away, but still... anyway, i took their photos, gave to another old woman, and then was drawn into conversation by a rather modern looking indian man who spoke fairly good english. he reprimanded me for giving to the beggars, and we got into an entire discussion about it. i confessed i had given away all of my money -- 400 Rupees -- and had not eaten lunch. he shook his head and explained that i am encouraging people not to work, and am supporting the raising of children who will learn that begging is the way they should get money. he told me that there are many many organizations, missionaries, public works departments that provide food, shelter, education, health care, and that they are underutilized. he said it was ok to give to crippled people who can't work, but that i am part of the problem because i encourage people to keep begging in the street rather than accept work or help from these local organizations. i was discouraged. what is the right thing to do in this place for these individual people? am i really being part of the problem? i decided i'd start asking other indians about this.
so the indian guy invited me to dinner with his friends and offered to take me to auroville (more about that place later), which of course declined. i am surprised by how many men think that women in foreign countries would travel alone with a man they just met anywhere. i mean, really.
i went back to the room, showered, wrote, and took a nap before dinner. i went down to this restaurant around the corner from where i am staying that has a nice roof-top seating area (where, if i'm not mistaken, kenny g was playing in the background). i waited for an hour for my meal before requesting it to go since the gate to the hotel closes at 10:30 and it was 10:15. very annoying. and the table next to me had been waiting for 2 hours for their food to come. too bad. the food was good and the atmosphere was nice and the staff were pleasant, but the service was just ridiculously inexcusably slow. turned out well for me, i just took it back to the room and enjoyed it out on the balcony overlooking the ocean and enjoying the breeze.
this morning i asked some other folks about the giving of alms, and again was told that i should not give except maybe to old crippled people. they had the same arguments that the other man did -- that there are many programs to help but that these people make more money by begging than many people do by working and so we who give encourage begging as a profession. there were stories about beggars dying with thousands of rupees stashed away (i'm not sure where the stash is), men who would adopt a terrible story about a sick wife and make a bunch of money in city after city, and stories about families sending out their children and elderly to beg and bring back the money as a condition for staying in the home and being fed. i'm sure some of these are true, but how many? and how should i factor that into what i do as i meet these people on the street? maybe i feel better to give something, because it feels so terrible to walk past and say no, but if giving is really part of the problem then i ought to accept those bad feelings and do the right thing. i just don't know. what do y'all think?
ok. now i am going back to the hotel to read before heading out to auroville. auroville is an international community -- a commune, really, recognized by unesco as a model for international living. should be interesting.
ok everyone. i hope you are all well. love you.
raquel
posted by Dr.Quel @ 11:23 AM
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